


the real adventure

by withoutwords



Category: due South
Genre: Exposition, Feels, First Kiss, Fluff without Plot, M/M, Mild Angst, Post-Call of the Wild, Post-Canon, Self-Esteem Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:07:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24958858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/withoutwords/pseuds/withoutwords
Summary: Ray knew it was going to happen. Hell, he’s pretty sure everyone, even deaf wolves, knew it was going to happen. Him and Fraser had been circling around each other since Ray took the undercover job as Ray Vecchio and Welsh had told him, “also, there’s a Mountie. It’s a whole thing.”So maybe he should have felt prepared.
Relationships: Benton Fraser/Ray Kowalski
Comments: 12
Kudos: 66





	the real adventure

**Author's Note:**

> There's just a lot of talking and mutual affection in this, it's a bit aimless. I just really felt like writing them. Hope you enjoy!

It says a lot about Ray that when Fraser pressed their mouths together for the first time - in the middle of some frozen, abandoned Canadian place that Ray will never learn how to pronounce - his initial thought was, ‘are we gonna get stuck like this’ followed closely by, ‘shit, shit, shit, how many ways am I gonna mess this up?’. 

Ray knew it was going to happen. Hell, he’s pretty sure everyone, even  _ deaf wolves, _ knew it was going to happen. Him and Fraser had been circling around each other since Ray took the undercover job as Ray Vecchio and Welsh had told him, “also, there’s a Mountie. It’s a whole thing.”

So maybe he should have felt prepared. 

He wasn’t. Not for the kiss, and not for the way Fraser breathed out like he’d been holding onto it for years, not for the way he pressed his cheek to Ray’s head and said, “That was lovely, Ray.”

And definitely, definitely not for the barrage of thoughts that hit him like a ten tonne truck straight after. 

The thoughts had followed him for days. In their cramped, freezing tent and over a mountain that put the last one to shame, and into an actual, real life town that might not have been a dot on the map but did have a room with running water and heat and a bed.

A  _ bed _ .

“You’ve been quiet, Ray,” Fraser says now, into the darkness of their room. Ray can’t remember the last time they were like this, together - not exactly like this, naked and wrapped around each other under the cover of sheets and blankets and the incessant beat of Ray’s heart - just close and warm and normal.

“Yeah,” Ray agrees, because Fraser knows him better than anyone else in his life so he thinks he owes them the truth at least. “There’s a lot to think about.”

“Yes, I suppose you’re right.”

Ray scoffs, curling a little further into Fraser’s side. “You suppose,” he repeats, mewling as Fraser brings a hand up to run through Ray’s hair. Washed and soft and warm, now. 

“What are you thinking about?”

“I donno. You. Me. This.”

“This?”

“Yeah, this,” Ray says again, motioning between them. “Not just buddies, is it?”

“I don’t think it ever was, Ray. At least, not for me.”

Ray gives himself a moment before trying to answer that. He presses his mouth to Fraser’s chest before mumbling, “Nah. Not for me, either.”

The thing is, Fraser’s beautiful. Which never escapes anyone’s attention, not when he’s so tall and wearing red and saying overly nice things like, “Thank you, kindly,” while most men can’t even remember a woman’s name.

But Fraser’s beautiful in ways that don’t even make sense. When he watches someone so concerned, or he tips his head while you talk to him, or even when he’s grown a grizzly beard and he smells like fish and he’s whispering to his wolf about the appropriate way to skin a rabbit.

It doesn’t make sense.

“Fraser,” Ray says, and sits up, looking down at Fraser where he’s sprawled out over the bed. The sight makes Ray’s heart leap to his throat - sweet, button-upped Fraser completely exposed in every way. 

“Ray?” Fraser asks, hand now behind his head, accentuating the line and curve of his bicep.

“I - I want this. I wanna be with you.”

“As do I.”

“But - but you gotta explain this to me. You gotta tell me what you’re thinking, cause me, y’know. Me, I’m thinking, what is the world’s most popular man doing with me when usually, when I’m with women, they’re always …” Ray groans and digs the heel of his hand into an eye. “I donno. They’re just not right for me.

“You were with Stella for a long time, Ray.”

“Yeah, but … but  _ after _ Stella. I mean I thought maybe I was just ruined for other people after her, but … but here we are.”

Fraser just looks at Ray for a while, rolling to his side to touch at Ray’s arm, run a thumb up and over his bare shoulder. “Ray … I’m sure it’s no surprise to you that I haven’t had much luck with relationships, either.”

“No, but that’s just lack’a trying.”

Fraser smiles. “You may be right. However the few encounters I have had, they certainly didn’t work out well.”

“So you’re saying we both screwed up with women so we might as well try with another man now.”

“You’re very witty, Ray,” Fraser says dryly, but there is a curl of his lips. It makes Ray’s smile stretch into a grin. “I’m saying, you’re not alone in your feelings. I have rarely been intimate with anyone, and it makes me feel that I can’t compete with … with your marriage, or even with encounters you’ve had with other people.”

“Frase,” Ray starts to say, not wanting to jump straight in with, that’s stupid, because he supposes that’s the point. Ray worrying about the future is the same as Fraser worrying about the past. There’s not a lot they can do about it, really.

“But, I can’t think of any reason  _ not _ to do this. The thought of not being with you is a lot more distressing than the thought of things not working out, in the end.”

“Yeah,” Ray says in a rush, leaning down closer to Fraser and gripping his forearm with a hand. “Yeah, definitely, that’s … yeah.”

“And as for why I’m here with you … Ray,” Fraser sits up now, Ray keeping a grip on him as they hover so close together. Fraser tips Ray’s chin up with a gentle finger. “At the risk of scaring you away,  _ I love you _ . I’ve loved you for a long time. As my partner, my friend, and now as my lover. You’re the best man I’ve ever known, and being here with you is truly the single most important thing that’s ever happened to me."

Ray squeezes Fraser’s arm tighter, trying to hold himself together. “Don’t let Vecchio hear you say that,” he jokes, deflecting as usual.

“Ray Vecchio is like my brother. It’s not the same thing, which I’m sure he would be very glad to hear.”

“Fraser,” Ray says quietly, ducking his face to hide as his forehead comes to rest on Fraser’s shoulder. His breath stutters as Fraser brings a hand up to touch at him again, feather light up across his side and around to his back.

Ray’s hand moves to do the same and soon they’re both pressed together in an embrace, arms wrapped around each other. Ray buries his face in Fraser’s neck, breathing in the smell of his soap, and sweat and sex on the sheets.

“We gotta work stuff out,” Ray finally says, his heart eased but his brain as erratic as ever. “What we’re gonna do, where we’re gonna live.”

“I know, Ray.”

“I’ve had enough of the quest.”

Fraser’s laugh is a little huff against Ray’s skin. “Yes, I know that too.”

“You know everything.”

“That’s obviously not true, Ray,” Fraser says in that voice that Ray knows usually means, ‘now you’re just being ridiculous’. He pulls out of the hug enough to get Fraser’s head in his hands, to press their mouths together again, gentle and sweet and a lot like their first.

“You know me,” Ray says, Fraser’s eyes blinking at him.

“I do.”

“And I know you.”

Fraser smiles softly, pulling Ray closer to him. “Better than I know myself, Ray.”

This time when Ray kisses him it’s open and wanting, Ray unsure if he’s pushing Fraser down onto the bed or Fraser’s pulling Ray down with him. It doesn’t matter. Ray covers Fraser with his body, kicks their legs together and groans into Fraser’s mouth as his hand drags down to grab at his ass. 

“You’re so lovely,” Fraser whispers into Ray’s ear as Ray moves to kiss at his jaw, then his throat, down over the lines and edges of his body. He’s paler and more jagged now, more muscles cutting over his belly. He’s definitely hairier than before, or he must be - if Ray’s own changes are anything to go by.

“Look who’s talking,” Ray teases, getting his hand around Fraser’s cock - which is also pretty perfect - and finding it already half hard. The sound Fraser makes sounds like it’s been dug out of him, long and groaning and desperate.

Despite that, he pulls Ray from him with, “No, Ray,” bringing Ray back up to him to grab at his neck and kiss at his mouth. “Listen, hear me, please. You’re wonderful.”

Ray licks his lips, seeing the sincerity in Fraser’s eyes, feeling it to his toes. “Thanks, Frase. You too. Wonderful, amazing, all the words.”

Fraser lets out a little laugh again, the sound fizzing over Ray’s skin - twisting their bodies together and taking Ray’s mouth in his own. And as much as Fraser thinks he can’t compete, or as little experience as he may claim to have - he’s as good at this as he is at anything. Kissing with purpose, and touching with praise, and fucking with a fierceness that Ray had always imagined was under there.

No, he’d always  _ known _ .

“Make love with me,” Fraser whispers into Ray’s ear, making his whole body tremble, and Ray just says,

“Yeah, yes, please,” because he can’t think of anything else he’d rather do. Ray knows he will worry, he knows they’re going to argue a lot and he knows that this is just the start of a much scarier adventure than he’d ever considered.

But as usual, Fraser’s right.

There’s nowhere else Ray would rather be than right here, with Fraser. Because even if he hasn’t said the words yet, he’s sure Fraser knows already.

Ray’s in love. And this time it’s going to be enough.

It’s everything.

**Author's Note:**

> thefancyspin.tumblr.com


End file.
